Compelling leaders are candid - they share information calmly and clearly BUT they are not blunt. They demonstrate respectful candidness.
Rather than do the one thing that gets in the way – judge – they embody deep respect for all people and their perspectives and actively honour the person and their perspective.
Being able to put judgements aside however is not a once-off decision, but a moment-by-moment process that requires ongoing awareness, commitment, and self-reflection.
This is so for EVERY HUMAN, no matter the level of mastery or years of practice. This challenge is due to the ego's primary function; its commitment is our personal survival. It is constantly scanning for danger and making assessments (that is, judging). It will covertly or subtly insert forms fear and, the other face of that coin, judgement.
Compelling leaders understand deeply that they can learn from everyone.
They're open to different perspectives, and the varied expression of shared values, which provides them with a richer field for creation and realising a vision.
They know that when we have shared values (e.g.: integrity, achievement, diligence, fun, compassion, love, …) there will be individual differences in how each person perceives the best way to fulfil those values.
Hence, the shared dialogue becomes about how we best approach the realising of a vision that is founded on those shared values. The perspective of others is honoured by the compelling leader who knows you cannot impose values or the beliefs and rules for how to fulfil those values.
They know that what they can do first is listen and then invite listening to uncover possibilities that people can share.
This type of listening is NOT just being polite; it is far deeper and more profound than that.
oliteness, as we know, can be simply a non-confrontational way of disagreeing with a person or even masking ungenerous thoughts. That is not the way of the compelling leader.
There's a significant difference in how they listen, learn, and look for possibilities and not for a way to impose the “right” way. When a compelling leader talks to you, you know they are listening to learn about you and to learn even richer perspectives for shaping our world.
There is so much to listen to when we learn how to listen. Beyond the attitude of deep respect from which the willingness to listen emerges, there are discrete skills for listening. Those skills are developed in the path we have created for you.
